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Nothing on TV, so: More Firefly recaps! Starting with
Our Mrs Reynolds
I love this opening scene. Just, Jayne and his hat and the way they bicker like a married couple like they do it every day. Heeeee. And then Mal's conversation with Inara afterwards, and also:
You know, it didn't even occur to me that Zoe would wear the dress. I don't think it occurred to them either.
You know, I'm pretty sure it'd occur to them to put Jayne in the dress before it did Zoe. And I'm sure you all needed the mental image of Jayne in a dress, but by god, if I'm having to see it, so do you lot.
Celebration time! Jayne is a happy, friendly, affectionate drunk. Who likes large sticks, especially when they make noise. Also, is he wearing the striped whorin' shirt from HoG, here? And then there's dancing and flowers and Zoe and Wash being so cute I almost can't stand it, and Jayne! Dancing! Smiling! Bweeee!
Bla bla bla wife, everyone teams up on Mal, and Zoe and Jayne bicker some more like siblings. Aw, poor Simon is so confused. And OMG, in the bit where Kaylee is hugging Saffron, Jayne is totally petting Saffron's shoulder all tentative-like and stuff and SOCUTE!
Can I just ignore the Mal/Inara parts of this episode? Because I'm eating as I watch/type this, and I'd kinda like for the food to, you know, stay down. Because as far as I'm concerned, people who get jealous over other people, despite claiming they've no interest in them, will burn in the special hell.
Awwww, Jayne offers Mal a large phallic symbol in exchange for Saffron. "Go play with your rain stick," indeed. Heeeee!
Mal grew up on a ranch with his mother and forty ranch hands. That rightthere is the first sentence of a gay erotic novel.
You know, I'm pretty sure I've read that one, actually. Hee. Pretty teenaged Mal, all alone with all them sweaty, muscled men ...
Mal's reaction to Saffron's little Bible quote is hilarious. The blood is clearly going to the wrong head, there. I keep expecting him to get all Bill&Ted. "Whoa. Dude."
Wash gets himself whacked in the head for being faithful to Zoe (aw!) and there's the obligatory girl-on-girl near-action. Could someone explain to me how Inara can run like that in that skirt? Because if I tried that, the damned thing would be up around my waist by the time I got up the first flight of stairs.
I love the scene with Jayne and Vera and the space suits. This is Jayne at his best, getting to shoot at things and save the days with some thrilling heroics. All he's missing is a couple of girls to properly thank him once he's done so. :D Hell, I bet he'd share with Kaylee; after all, she helped, with the fixing things up and stuff.
And now, my favourite of them all:
Jaynestown
We start with Kaylee being cute, first with Simon and then with Inara, and then there's shirtless!Jayne. Wheee! Simon immediately forgets Kaylee's even there, and there's some funniness with Jayne and surgical tape.
Bla bla bla Simon tries to bumble his way through negotiating with the mudders, and then they run into the statue of Jayne. And Simon reacts by getting ... extremely oral, apparently. No, seriously, people, if I had a dick, it'd be standing at attention. (Er, sorry. I'm reading too much Jaynefic, it's rubbing off on me.)
Bla bla bla plotcakes. # Jaaaayne! The maaan they call Jaaaayne! # *boogies down* So much love for this sooooong! And Simon, again, gets all gape-y. And gulps down the mudders milk, hee. The mudders recognise Jayne and get their hero-worship on, in particular a girl and a bloke, who plaster themselves all over Jayne. Okay, seriously, we're meant to believe he only took the girl upstairs? Riiiiiight. Like Jayne's ever gonna turn down an opportunity to get sexed, by anyone. Oh, and:
Elsewhere in the bar, Simon has decided to deal with all the new competition for Jayne's attention by getting plastered with Kaylee. Seriously -- Simon's acting like a guy who just got dumped.
And he is! Poor Kaylee, she's totally rebound girl, here, and probably doesn't even realise it. Aww. Poor girl. Let me kiss and make it better.
"I would never--Not with Kaylee!" Oh, Simon. At least let the girl down easy, you dolt. And button up your shirt, you're going to distract Jayne. And I'm jumping way ahead here, but: Inara's reaction to finding out about Jayne? Hilarious. Bwahahahaha!
Awwwww, Simon standing up to Stitch and refusing to tell where Jayne is. Love, love, love! And then Jayne tries to speech, which doesn't turn out all that well, but I much prefer that over the spur-of-the-moment-miraculously-inspirational speeches that usually happen in these situations. And then that Stitch fellow refers to Simon as one of Jayne's "boys," a term which Jayne objects to. Poor Simon, dumped, bitched at by Kaylee, beaten up, thrown in the dirt, and now this? He doesn't deserve this!
More plotcakes, and Jayne's boygroupie from the night before goes and gets himself killed. Cue Jayne angst. Aw, etc. Refer to my icon, people. Yet more plotcakes, and more Jayne angst, this time at Mal. Awwww. Hug him, dammit!
Yes, that one was a bit short, but I was distracted. Jayne!
Out of Gas
Okay, I fnid myself wondering, in the first flashback scene, what happened to that cook Mal was talking about. Because I don't think any of the other crew members can really cook, so they must've chowed down some pretty bad food before Book came on board. And speaking of food: dinner flashback scene, wheee!
If Simon had pigtails, Jayne would be pulling on them.
He so would, too. And now I'm picturing Simon in pigtails, and possibly a schoolgirl uniform, and um. I'll be in my bunk. And despite the teasing, Jayne looks pretty good-natured when he tells Simon to "deeply move yourself to blow out them candles so we can try a slice." Awwww. Bless. And then things to all to hell, as usual. Crap. But it does give Simon and Jayne a chance to have themselves a bit of a standoff, oooh!
And once again, Jayne stands around in the background worrying while Simon tries to fix someone. Awwwwwwww! Okay, I swear, I'll stop doing that. But awwwwww!
Hee. Wash and his moustache. I have a bunny about that 'tache. And look, it's Zaphod Breeblebox, Space Mechanic! (What? He totally is!)
Insert a lot of Mal/Inara crap here, and skip straight (heh) to Jayne fussing over Mal. Awwwwwwwwww! Wait, I said I'd stop doing that, didn't I? Sorry. Also, this is how you do UST, people! Take note.
Yay, Jayne flashback! He's all dirty and scruffy and um. I kinda like him like this, all muddy and sweaty. Also, confused. Aw--Er, I mean. And Mal looks all outraged that Jayne has to share a bunk with the other goon. He so wants Jayne for himself.
Mal saves the day, and Jayne gets to do some more standing around in the medbay looking worried. Nawww--DAMMIT!
Next up: Ariel. But that's for next time. I can't take that and Jaynestown in one evening.
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From:
no subject
I'm just mad about Saffron
And Saffron's mad about me
I'm just mad about Saffron
And she's just mad about me...
Not to mention: "A special hell..."
And Jaynestown!! "We gotta go to the crappy town where I'm a hero."
hee!
From:
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I dread watching Ariel, I tell you what. I predict a high degree of incoherency and "Jayne! Noooooo!" Sigh.
From:
no subject
Um, I've really enjoyed your recaps, hahaha. They're so very Jayne-ish. And I like how although you're clearly a Jayne/Simon fan, you're not pulling the Mal/Jayne punches, hahahaa. It's a lot of fun.
Yay for new Firefly converts. :D
From:
no subject
Ewww, Mal! ;P Though, speaking of threesomes, I do like the idea of Zoe/Wash/Jayne. Mmmm.
Bester/Wash, come on!
Okay, I'm sorry, I'm going to have to kill you now. Nothing personal, you understand.
Um, I've really enjoyed your recaps, hahaha. They're so very Jayne-ish. And I like how although you're clearly a Jayne/Simon fan, you're not pulling the Mal/Jayne punches, hahahaa. It's a lot of fun.
:D Thanks! Well, I'm big on equal opportunity. <g> And you know, they have this big homoerotic UST triangle of DOOOOM thing going on, I'd have to be blind not to see it. I may think Simon/Mal wouldn't work out, but I can still see the UST, and Mal/Jayne is just mmmmm.
From:
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And, don't kill me! Wash/Bester isn't THAT far fetched! LOL
As for Mal/Simon, yeah. I don't see it working out, either. But I can see Mal/Jayne and I can see Jayne/Simon, so, hahahaha. At least there's that. Mal/Jayne is definitely my Firefly slash OTP. :D
From:
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It's not so much "Eww, Mal" as that I can't see Mal in a functioning relationship. I think it's the irritation with Mal and Inara. (... Haaaate!)
But I can see Mal/Jayne and I can see Jayne/Simon
At last! Someone else who can see both! I prefer Jayne/Simon, obviously, but I do like reading Mal/Jayne by someone who can make me believe it for the course of the story. Also, Mal/Jayne/Simon. Mmm, threesomes.
From:
no subject
And, we're the same in regards to Mal/Jayne and Simon/Jayne, just switched. I prefer Mal/Jayne but I will read Simon/Jayne if the author is good and can make me believe it. Maybe I have higher standards for my Jayne/Simon. I think it's less logical for them to hook up than Mal/Jayne. But, I also like Mal a lot more than I like Simon, so I'm sure there's that, too. Heh.
From:
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(Well, compared to other pairings, anyway. Especially Jayne/River, which, what? That one, I just don't quite grasp. But then, I don't quite grasp River het in general, except for CSI, so there is that.)
Also:
He's just gotta be retaught, etc., and he can't find that from Inara (or Simon, really).
Yesyesyes! Exactly! I think my big problem with Mal/Simon is that Simon, too, has a tendency to needlessly complicate these things, and combined with Mal, that'd just lead to disaster. It's why Simon had such trouble with Kaylee, because Kaylee doesn't quite see that. Jayne, on the other hand, would just roll his eyes and tell Simon (or Mal!) to stop being an idiot and take things as they come. Which is why Mal/Jayne still makes more sense to me than Mal/Simon. :D