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20.Must not taunt the French any more.
23.Must never ask anyone who outranks me if they've been smoking crack.
25.Never confuse a Dutch soldier for a French one.
29.The Irish MPs are not after 'Me frosted lucky charms'.
31.Not allowed to let sock puppets take responsibility for any of my actions.
32.Not allowed to let sock puppets take command of my post.
33.Not allowed to chew gum at formation, unless I brought enough for everybody.
34.(Next day) Not allowed to chew gum at formation even if I did bring enough for everybody.
57.The proper response to a lawful order is not 'Why?'
58.The following words and phrases may not be used in a cadence- Budding sexuality, necrophilia, I hate everyone in this formation and wish they were dead, sexual lubrication, black earth mother, all Marines are latent homosexuals, Tantric yoga, Gotterdammerung, Korean hooker, Eskimo Nell, we've all got jackboots now, slut puppy, or any references to squid.
79.I am neither the king nor queen of cheese.
87.If the thought of something makes me giggle for longer than 15 seconds, I am to assume that I am not allowed to do it.
107.Must not mock command decisions in front of the press.
114.I cannot trade my CO to the Russians.
129.The Microsoft ® Dancing Paperclip is not authorized to countermand any orders.
142.'Calvin-Ball' is not authorized PT.
158.The revolution is not now.
171.On training missions, try not to shoot down the General's helicopter.
186.I am not the Emperor of anything.
197.I am not allowed to sing 'Henry the VIII I am' until verse 68 ever again.
203.'To conquer the earth with an army of flying monkeys" is a bad long term goal to give the re-enlistment NCO.
(From 213 Things Skippy is No Longer Allowed to Do in the US Army)
23.Must never ask anyone who outranks me if they've been smoking crack.
25.Never confuse a Dutch soldier for a French one.
29.The Irish MPs are not after 'Me frosted lucky charms'.
31.Not allowed to let sock puppets take responsibility for any of my actions.
32.Not allowed to let sock puppets take command of my post.
33.Not allowed to chew gum at formation, unless I brought enough for everybody.
34.(Next day) Not allowed to chew gum at formation even if I did bring enough for everybody.
57.The proper response to a lawful order is not 'Why?'
58.The following words and phrases may not be used in a cadence- Budding sexuality, necrophilia, I hate everyone in this formation and wish they were dead, sexual lubrication, black earth mother, all Marines are latent homosexuals, Tantric yoga, Gotterdammerung, Korean hooker, Eskimo Nell, we've all got jackboots now, slut puppy, or any references to squid.
79.I am neither the king nor queen of cheese.
87.If the thought of something makes me giggle for longer than 15 seconds, I am to assume that I am not allowed to do it.
107.Must not mock command decisions in front of the press.
114.I cannot trade my CO to the Russians.
129.The Microsoft ® Dancing Paperclip is not authorized to countermand any orders.
142.'Calvin-Ball' is not authorized PT.
158.The revolution is not now.
171.On training missions, try not to shoot down the General's helicopter.
186.I am not the Emperor of anything.
197.I am not allowed to sing 'Henry the VIII I am' until verse 68 ever again.
203.'To conquer the earth with an army of flying monkeys" is a bad long term goal to give the re-enlistment NCO.
(From 213 Things Skippy is No Longer Allowed to Do in the US Army)
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Tears rolling down, scaring my cat with the loudness of my laughter, unable to breathe. All that good stuff.
Thank you so much for the link. Needless to say, it has been passed on to my brother and father, both of whom are in the Army ;)
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