Bugger this for a lark ...

So there's this wee playground/park across the street from my flat, right? This park has a couple of "Japanese cherry" trees (I have no idea what they're called in English), which are really pretty to look at, but have an annoying tendency to shed white and pink petals if you so much as look at them crossly. This means that when the weather decides to muck about for a bit and do this funky twirly strongish wind thing, the trees panic and shed like mad, and the overall effect is not unlike a petal blizzard. Which is probably very pretty to look at, except I didn't get much of a chance to get a good look at it, because when this happened, I was in the kitchen making breakfast, and I didn't find out about the petal blizzard until I walked out of the kitchen and got blinded by the god damned petal blizzard happening IN MY FUCKING LOUNGE, because I'd left the window open, and had to BLINDLY FUMBLE MY WAY TO THE WINDOW TO CLOSE IT and now there are petals EVERYFUCKINGWHERE!

RAGE!

*deep breath*

Right. In other, cheerier news, if, like me, you ever tried to read Stephen Hawking's A Brief History Of Time, and didn't manage¹, you need to go and read this. Now. I'm still confused by anything beyond quarks², but there are musical numbers, cameos by the Marquis de Sade and Tony Blair³, Eminem vs Hawking, Particle Physicists whomping things, and assorted slashiness (Newton/his roommate OTP!).

And when you're done with that, twinkledru is working on recapping American History, which is very funny and also very handy for those of us whose classes on American History consisted of "So the British sent a bunch of lunatics off to the New World, where they faffed about for a couple of years, threw a hissy fit over some tea, and then stomped their feet and refused to play nice anymore," reading all of the North & South books, and watching Gone With The Wind a couple of hundred times.

Now I want to do some history recapping of my own. Perhaps some Ancient Roman History, as A History Of The World would take me the next lifetime or six, and that wouldn't be worth it even if it would give me an opportunity for a plethora of hed pastede on yay jokes when I get to the French Revolution. But Ancient Rome, I know and love. Or perhaps some Roman Mythology. *ponders* If only I knew how to bring the funny ...

¹ I tried, honestly, but thinking concretely in the abstract has never been something I'm any good at. This is also why geometry was the bane of my secondary school maths existence. Funnily enough, I never had any problems with algebra or trig, but I suspect that's mostly because I tend to see numbers as little people who have all sorts of illicit relationships in the equations I'm supposed to solve, so Algebra is like a soap opera to me.

² Thankfully, we never got beyond quarks in school, so I wasn't required to break my brain in order to pass physics. Still, reading about physics to this day makes me have flashbacks to panicked studying and desperately trying to get a passing grade, and thank god my physics exam my last year was an oral one, because I'm much better at explaining these things out loud with the help of a blackboard. Maybe I should become a teacher.⁴

³ Not at the same time, though. Thank god.

⁴ If you listen carefully, you can hear my mother scream "NOOOOooooOOOO!"

(no subject)

*hugs broadband* NEVER LEAVE ME AGAIN!

(no subject)

OMG WADE! On my TV! And they're talking about him being in Michael Jackson's bed and no no no BAD IMAGES HELP!