Dilemma

[bubosquared]

So, I have this friend. let's call her 'A'. I like A. She's funny, she's cool, I like talking to her. She's not one of my closest friends like Nat and Nette and Ruth and Molly, but she's my friend.

I met A through a then mutual friend, 'B'. B and I are now no longer friends. A and B are still close. I think. Their friendship is not a problem. As I've said before, I don't make people 'choose sides', and no matter how much I'd like A to see B "like she really is," I know that what I think of B is my perception, coloured by my experience with her. Also, I'm not delusional enough to think that A would choose me over B.

The thing is, B has claimed certain things were true. I have openly said I didn't believe her. A has said that what B said was the truth. I now have proof that B was lying like a dog.

Dillemma's: Is A in on the lies, or does she honestly believe B, and do I tell A about this either way?

I fucking hate this.

Comments

[sandrine]

It depends. If the two of you are friends and she's *not* in on B's lies, you actually owe her that, because she deserves to know that a friend of her made her believe things that are lies. So if the proof is really unambiguous, I'd present it to A and see how she reacts. If the proof is something you think A might doubt, then you should rather not tell her.

::shurg:: Just my humble opinion. But then again, I don't know either A or B, or at least don't know who they are, and it's hard to judge those matters from the outside. And I concede that it's a bit ironic that I of all people gives others advice on friendship. I should rather keep my mouth shut in those matters ...

[bubosquared.livejournal.com]

The proof is pretty damned conclusive. And yes, I owe it to her, but on the other hand, I'm not sure if, if she's in on it and I tell her I know [as opposed to just suspect] the truth, that may be implicitly forcing her to choose. Which I don't wanna do. Cause I seriously don't wanna lose her. :/

Thanks for the advice, though.

Just my thought...

[sorchar.livejournal.com]

But if she's participating in the lies, wouldn't that mean she's already made her choice?

Re: Just my thought...

[bubosquared.livejournal.com]

Eh. You're right, I suppose, but she's only once 'participated in the lies', and it's never been mentioned again. She never even reacted to my reasons for not believing B. [This was online.]