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Melle: Have you read the one where we ripped apart the most horrid M/O EVER?
Fleur: Yes. <g>
Melle: I'm willing to suffer a lot in the name of M/O, but when Marcus grows BREASTS, I draw the line.
Fleur: *pets Marcus* *gropes his breasts*
Melle: *covers eyes* Okay, I like "wake up girl" fics, but ...
Fleur: I like them, too, but no.
Fleur: !!! "Marcus woke up as a girl and decided his first order of business would be to seduce Oliver Wood."
Melle: Marcus: *wake up, sees self in mirror, realises is girl* *SPROING*
Terence: *rubs eyes* "Marcus? Why are you on the ceiling?
Melle: lt;lt;-- once had a girl!Larry Mullen bunny
Melle: I'm sorry, but girl!Marcus DOES NOT COMPUTE
Fleur: GOD DAMMIT I WANT TO WRITE IT JUST TO SHOW IT CAN BE DONE.
Fleur: GOD HE WOULD BE AN UGLY WOMAN.
Melle: As opposed to the georgeous bloke he actually is?
Melle: And oooh, *encourage*
Fleur: *dies laughing*
Melle: (Ahaha! Terence: "Wow. You have ... tits." *pokes at them*)
Fleur: (Marcus: *smacks Terence's hand* Sod the fuck off!)
Melle: Hm. girl!HP stories. Jordan was writing this girl!Seamus story once.
Fleur: I want girl!Marcus, man, and Adrian and Ter being perverts.
Fleur: *dies laughing*
Melle: And Marcus stomping over to the Gryffindor table because that's the only place he'll be safe from Ade and Ter's groping!
Fleur: And Oliver and Percy are just going "...?!?!"
Melle: And the twins ogling his cleavage.
Fleur: Yes. And he's just SULKING and Oliver's sort of leering and Percy kicks him under the table.
Melle: (Dear self: the word "Boobies" is not as funny as you seem to think.)
Fleur: And then Marcus opens his mouth and, well, teeth, and the dorks are just going "... okay, who are you?"
Fleur: (Oh, but it is.)
Melle: Marcus: *snarl*
Twins: "... FLINT?" *die laughing, do not recover for the next few days*
Fleur: And Oliver's just glaring and going "It can't be Flint, idiots, Flint is male."
Marcus: "Well, I WAS, yesterday!"
Oliver: *jaw drops* "FLINT?!"
Marcus: *prays for the ground to swallow him*
Oliver: "But-but-but..." *pokes Marcus's breasts*
Marcus: "WILL PEOPLE PLEASE STOP GROPING ME?"
Percy: *matter-of-factly* "Well, you can't deny that they're large enough that people simply can't help themselves." *glares at Oliver pointedly*
Oliver: *gives Percy an innocent "what?!" look*
Marcus: "Somebody kill me, PLEASE?"
Oliver: *snicker* "No violence towards ladies."
Marcus: *scowl* "I may be female, but I'm NOT a LADY!"
Oliver: *pokes Marcus's breasts again* "Hey, they jiggle."
Marcus: *punches Oliver*
Percy: *amused* "Well, Oliver, you must admit that wasn't very ladylike."
Oliver: *muffled, hand over face* "You hit like a girl, Flint."
Marcus: "Oh like you can do better?"
Oliver: "Yeah."
Percy: "Now, Oliver, there's no need to prove yourself, we can't have you hitting ladies at the table."
Marcus: "Stay out of this, Weasel."
Oliver: "Don't call him that, Flint."
Marcus: "Make me!"
Oliver: *grins* "What do we call you now, anyway? Marcia?"
Marcus: *kicks Oliver*
Oliver: "OW!" *kicks him back*
Marcus: *kicks*
Percy: "Oh, for goodness' sake." *stands and leaves*
Marcus: *trips him*
Oliver: *can't help laughing* "That wasn't very nice, Miss Flint."
Marcus: *growls, punches Oliver in the stomach*
Oliver: *screws his eyes shut, trying not to cry out* "Calm down, eh?"
Marcus: "Then stop GROPING me!"
Oliver: "Then stop having TITS!"
Marcus: "Oh, like I CHOSE TO LOOK LIKE THIS?"
Oliver: "WELL IT'S A SLIGHT IMPROVEMENT!"
Marcus: "Why, because now I'm easier to GROPE?"
Oliver: "BECAUSE I DON'T HAVE TO LOOK AT YOUR UGLY FACE ALL THE TIME."
Oliver: "THERE ARE OTHER POINTS TO FOCUS ON." *looks down* "Two, in fact."
Marcus: "STOP OGLING ME GODDAMMIT!"
Oliver: "Um... no?"
Marcus: "Stop ogling me or I'll ... um ..."
Oliver: "Or you'll, um, what, scratch me with your nails?"
Marcus: "I'll ... kick you!"
Oliver: "Or you'll, um, what, scratch me with your nails?"
Marcus: "I'll ... kick you!"
Oliver: "Oh, come on. Is it THAT bad?"
Marcus: "Is what that bad? Being groped and ogled? Hell yes!"
Oliver: "By me?"
Marcus: "... Yes!"
Oliver: "Oh, FINE!"
Marcus: "... At least, in public."
Oliver: *eyes light up* "Now THAT sounds promising."
Marcus: *blink* "It does?"
Oliver: "Yeah." *leers again*
Marcus: "You know, there's a hall closet right near ..."
Oliver: *jumps to his feet*
Marcus: *drags him to the closet*
Oliver: *as soon as the door is shut, grabs Marcus's breasts*
Marcus: "Ow?"
Oliver: "Oh, come on, toughen up." *squeezes*
Marcus: "How would you like it if I squeezed your balls like that? OW!"
Oliver: "Sod off, it's not the same thing."
Marcus: "Is too." *grabs Oliver's crotch*
Oliver: "Um, OW?! Fucking hell!"
Marcus: "My point exactly."
Oliver: "Shut up and let me feel them, dammit."
Marcus: "Then be careful, you fucker."
Oliver: *slides one hand under Marcus's shirt*
Marcus: "Um." *squirms a little*
Oliver: "Um WHAT."
Marcus: "... Nothing."
Oliver: "No, what?"
Marcus: "NOTHING. Just. Keep doing that."
Oliver: *moves his hands up to hold Marcus's breasts, leaning over to whisper in Marcus's ear* "Huge, you know?"
Marcus: *squirms again* "Shut up."
Oliver: "What?! It's a sodding compliment, you prat."
Marcus: *mutters something under his breath*
Oliver: "What?"
Marcus: "Since when do you go around complimenting me? Has hell frozen over? Is the end of the world coming?"
Oliver: "No, you've just got damn nice tits."
Marcus: "... Thanks."
Oliver: *closes his eyes, pressing his hips into Marcus*
Marcus: *bites back amoan*
Oliver: *rubbing his thumb over one of Marcus's nipples* "... fuck, Flint..."
Marcus: *groas softly*
Oliver: *presses against him again* "I want to fuck you."
Marcus: *is silent for a moment* "Fuck. Yes."
Oliver: "Wasn't a question."
Marcus: "Go on, then." *wraps a leg around Oliver*
Oliver: *backs Marcus up against the far wall, one hand fumbling to undo his trousers*
Marcus: *fumbles at his robes and trousers*
Oliver: *shrugs his robes off and loosens his tie*
And then Fleur had to leave, saving me from losing my het virginity to this insanity. Oi. (And yet, it was ... strangely hot. Then again, I need professional help, so what do I know?)
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Hee! Marcus' boobies are made of jello! ::Is twelve::
::Runs off giggling madly::
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Apparently, so is Oliver. "Boobies! *poke*"
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Ow my brain!
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Besides, since when is Girl!Marcus such a bad thing?
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::on the other hand, dies laughing at the RP-ish bit::
::wants Girl!Marcus/Oliver::
*moves his hands up to hold Marcus's breasts...*
If that was coming from anyone else, it would have been just plain strange. o_O
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