(no subject)

[bubosquared]

I hate this. I hate that I'm always the supportive one, the shoulder to cry on. I hate that i can't make myself say no, that I can't make myself want to say no. I hate this feeling of obligation. I hate myself, and I hate that i have to lock this away from the very people I love most, because I will make myself always be there for them, no matter what, no matter how badly crushed I sometimes feel.

i can't breathe

I'm not fucking strong enough for this!

dammit

Comments

unfortunately, my user name isn't true

[icanreadyourmnd.livejournal.com]

I *can't* read your mind, nor do I want to, since that's an invasion of privacy. But if you need a hug, even from as far away as LA, you can have it. And hell, if I was still going to Frankfurt (which I'm not, not this year), I'd arrange a hug from ther as well.

If you ever need to talk, just to get things off your chest, my email address is on my profile. I'm happy to listen and be a far away shoulder.

I know about being supportive and not feeling strong enough or being supportive and kicked in the ass for it. Or feeling used. Or being too tired to go on. But we all manage somehow. That doesn't help you, right now - whatever is going on - so if you need a willing voice/person on the other end (even if it's just electronic), just yell, really, I wouldn't offer if I didn't mean it.

Re: unfortunately, my user name isn't true

[bubosquared.livejournal.com]

Thanks for the offer. I'm sure I'll end up taking you up on it in the future. For now, I'm okay again. Like you said, everyone needs a shoulder sometimes. :)

no problema

[icanreadyourmnd.livejournal.com]

...having just come off a month worth of worry about my horse being sick with who the hells know what (we still odn't know what he had, just that the he tried to die on us) and people who fought with me about how to take care of him, as well as the nightmare in NY ... and hardly knowing anyone

no problema

[icanreadyourmnd.livejournal.com]

...having just come off a month worth of worry about my horse being sick with who the hells know what (we still odn't know what he had, just that the he tried to die on us) and people who fought with me about how to take care of him, as well as the nightmare in NY ... and hardly knowing anyone well enough to ask for a physical hug (um, for some reason my email just sent this twice without me asking it to - ignore those and sorry!!!!), I thought I'd go nuts. so I understand.

So I went and got my character a written full body sleeping hug and that seemed to suffice briefly... nad now pepe are all friendly again (and I've taken a HUGE emotional step backward) but I do know what it's like, so yell as and when you need to. I'm nearly always on the computer...