bubosquared | (no subject)

Current Mood: scared
Current Music: Bob Dylan - Lonesome Day Blues

Entry tags:

news of the world

(no subject)

(I'm not angry, I'm not judging, I'm not generalising, I'm just scared. I feel like that's the only negative emotion I'm capable of anymore, and it'll be a long time before I can feel anything else again. And I'm not going to apologise for that, or for wanting to hide from the people who are enforcing that feeling. That doesn't make them bad. It just makes me frightened.)

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be yourself and know that you don't have to apologise for it, okay?

I wish you inner peace. I wish us all peace, inner and world. And while we might not be able to have one, we can at least strive for the other.

Hugz.

At any rate, I'm sorry if I hurt your feelings and am making you feel more scared. It wasn't the intent. And I won't make any excuses, even though I might want to mouth off a little bit. ^^; So, I'll just say I'm sorry and leave it at that.

Okay, yeah, that's fine. We're all terrified. (I'm still vaguely worried that people I know and love could die. LA is a potential target, and who knows what these people or their copycats have up their sleeves.)

I am angry, I'm sorry to say. Scared and sad and angry. But not angry at any country, or any race. Angry at the people who destroyed those lives. Scared that there are more that haven't been caught. Sad that so many people died.

At least allow me to admire the bravery and courage of my people, okay? It's no more bravery than anyone else would have, but I'm amazed and overjoyed that we Americans are not more than half machine, but wholly human and capable of love. :)

But why not just admire the bravery and courage of people in general? There are so many non-Americans volunteering, people over here (hello! me?) caring and doing what they can. That's why I can't understand the "my people" reflex. but then, I could never grasp partiottism.

(Not questioning your beliefs here, okay? Just trying to understand.

Hmm, I've never been very good at explaining things, so I'm not even going to try. But is it necessary to understand? If it helps some people work through this, then why not? I'd rather see a "I'm proud to be an American!" than a "All those fuckers should die!", wouldn't you?

I never understood patriotism before this. It's especially hard to be patriotic when so many of your friends are international, and internationally, your country is looked down upon by many, many as a trough of overfed, retarded pigs with guns. Patriotism was downright unfashionable. But now, our cynical, decadent nation is actually unifying, to help, to serve, in ways that many would not have believed possible. One reason for the described admiration.

Worldwide response has been astounding, to the point that I've broken down in tears to hear what so many so far away have been doing for us. The nationwide "my people" reflex is like a family's response to a family trauma, to use a poor analogy. Even when outside support is enough to move you to tears, to some extent it's necessary to turn inward for healing, as well. As cheesy as it sounds, we need to be together right now. That realization that's sweeping the nation is what's sending people in droves to blood banks and is bringing millions of dollars per day into aid charities.

What's important for you to understand (despite a lot of what comes through the media) is the love and gratitude that so many Americans feel towards the people in foreign countries, like yourself, that are reaching to help despite the distance. Honestly. Personally, it's restored quite a bit of my faith in humanity. But the wounds are very, very fresh. Everyone's still dealing with the pain, the anger and the /incredible/ shock. As stated several times before, the fact that it took place on our mainland soil shatters innumerable illusions and the sense of security held so dear to a very young nation. International gestures aren't being taken for granted and /certainly/ aren't being ignored, but the reaction that you see taking place is the same reaction that has happened over and over throughout history, in countries all over the world, when a tragedy like this has struck.

I know that the things that I've said couldn't have helped to appease your fears, and I'm sorry. This threatens to become Europe vs. America in a lot of places, and that thought is incredibly depressing. Please... be patient with all of us and, as a completely sincere plea, without any intended regionalism or other baggage, please try to understand what we're going through right now-- even though I know that we're all terrified, regardless of nationality. We're the unfortunate firsts in this generation (of the 1st world) to experience something like this, the resulting pain and patriotism of an intensity that only our (globally, all-inclusive "our") grandparents can recall, and it's going to take some time before everyone recovers from it.

I'm no good at expressing things like this, so if I've said anything here to offend, please, please, please tell me directly-- tell me what times (GMT, since that's easiest) you'd be online, even, because I'd very much want to hear your responses and feelings in real-time.

I haven't seen anything about your reactions that warrants your feeling apologetic.

I honestly would like to feel that we are all in this together, and that if my nation gets *anything* positive out of this it would be a renewed, long-overdue and *lasting* understanding of the fact that we need our allies, we need cooperation, this lone-superpower-Bigfoot bullshit is not going to cut it anymore. Not that it ever did. We'll see. Right now, admittedly, the prognosis is not entirely favorable.

See, that's the thing. Because this isn't some grief-induced irrationality, this is an attitude I've experienced from a lot of Americans, but I thought my friends were not like that, and now some of them turn out to be. And that's frightening.

This happened on American soil, in an attack against an American landmark, but it is a universal problem. If we don't move forward with that *global perspective* firmly in mind, we will have learned absolutely nothing. That may sound preachy, but it's my honest opinion.

Well, I agree. but maybe I'm preachy, too. :)

But see, that's just the thing-- that attitude is a grief-induced irrationality for a lot of us.

You don't need to apologize for your feelings, Melle© You haven't said or done anything wrong, as far as I can see© I understand your point of view and I hope saner heads prevail soon©

I just realized why you got them. I was typing my comment from the school computer, which is a Mac, while you use a PC. Of course, it took me all day to figure this out.

The solution is not to run away. You have to talk about it and try to resolve things, Melle. You know my email, and you know my AIM, so why don't you try talking it over with me? I know we're both mature adults and can come to some sort of rational conclusion.

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