bubosquared | (no subject)

First of all, some quotes:

Schuyler:If I am searching for info on ABBA, Amazon would like to offer me the following things: ABBA-Gold by ABBA, Super Trouper by ABBA, Thank You for the Music by ABBA, Voulez-Vous by ABBA, Abba Pater by Pope John Paul II, or The Visitors by ABBA.
One of these things is not like the others.

Rakshi: ALL HAIL DOM! WHO LIT THE PILOT LIGHT OF ELIJAH'S MOJO!! ALL HAIL THE PROPHET ELIJAH. BRINGER OF TRUTH, JUSTICE, AND THE ONE TRUE LURVE!
Excuse me.. I feel a sudden urge to sacrifice a goat.
C'mere goat! GET BACK HERE! You're being sacrificed to the prophet Elijah! You should be GLAD to go!

Elfie: (re: a customer's accusations that she was "trying to pull one over me") I'll pull something over you, yeah. Howsabout a GIANT CONDOM TO PROTECT SOCIETY FROM YOU?

Melle: Hey, R. [coworker], do you want anything from [stationary supplies place]?
R.: A brain.
Melle: ...
R.: Second hand will do. The dumber the better, you don't need much for this job.
Melle: ... I'm working with a bunch of zombies!
R.: That's actually much truer than you might think.

Melle: (later, to other coworkers) So according to the zombies in the other room ...

Melle: *blinkblink* I like cheese
Rod of Squirrel Nim: Ah, but so does Destiny itself.
Melle: So could I bribe Destiny with Cheese?
Rod of Squirrel Nim: Seek not to turn aside the hand of feta.

Ruth: Also, apologies to anyone thrown off by the year 2009 appearing on previous messages. My motherboard is having some issues. I've tried suggesting it find a good therapist, but it just won't listen.

Meg: Anyways, I need to go sit and read the Tempest; my English midterm on Thursday is comprised entirely of remembering authors' names and work titles, and being able to match them to quotes. [Note: I don't think I'm allowed to call William Shakespeare "Billy S." Which is a shame, really.]

Amy: Damnit! I hate it when my friends turn into Elder Gods!

Melle: (referring to a team building day with co-workers) Gotta love any situation in which the phrase "Waiter! Can we have a fork, please? Oh, and a dog!" is not a non-sequitur.

Ang: So I'm reading what I can find on Library of Moria, and I think some people need to be severely educated about one particular thing: HOBBITS ARE NOT CREAMY.
I mean, sure, a slightly toasted halfling is a tasty trate for any troll, but I've never heard them described as "creamy." "Good with ketchup," perhaps.

Also, a meme that's gone round LJ a few times: Ask my characters anything! Any character from any of my stories any question, and they'll answer.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

Curtains!Ron: Hullo, Ron. Tell me, did you ever confront Hermione about her relationship with Malfoy? And did you ever tell her how you feel about her? If so, how did she react?

Ron hems and haws, and eventually needs to be threatened with the muse-prod before finally answering the question*

"No. I mean, she's married to the Git--(What? Oh, come on, Harry, he is! Oh, all right)--to Malfoy for six years now, and there's just no reason for me to disrupt their happy marriage, right?

"Right."

*exit, stage left, muttering, followed by a slightly exasparated Harry*

Thanks for answering my question, Ron!

Love the "slightly exasperated" Harry bit. I can so see it happening.

Harry's all throwing up his hands and going "Honestly!"