(no subject)

[bubosquared]

So rumour has it Britney got married in Vegas. Apparently, armistice and I cannot leave a surreal fact like that be, and had to add more surrealism.

Beth: HAHAHAHHAA.
Beth: Okay, this is the funniest thing ever.
Beth: I am officially amused.
Melle: It's a pity she didn't Marry Justin, though. THAT would've been something.
Melle: Or even better: Lance! (Or JOEY!)
Beth: Ahhh, but Justin would have had to have planned his wedding.
Beth: There would've had to be roses and candles and his mama.
Beth: And her mama.
Beth: And all of his friends.
Melle: True.
Melle: But not for Joey!
Melle: <<-- incredibly amused by this idea
Beth: And if the runner was wrinkled, he would've pitched a fit.
Beth: No, Joey would be perfect for a Vegas wedding.
Beth: Lance would be perfect, actually.
Beth: What with his love of the drink and strippers and all.
Melle: But Lance would be all "I'm too young to get married!" and run off to go lick whipped cream off a stripper's boobs.
Beth: Hahahaha.
Beth: Yeah, he would.
Melle: Whereas Joey'd be all "I'm marrying BRITNEY SPEARS! Score!"
Beth: Best honeymoon ever.
Melle: Damn, now I want to read Brit/Joey!
Beth: Hahaha. Brit/Joey shotgun wedding!
Melle: With Brianna the flower girl and Chris is torn between laughing hysterically and being upset for Justin, except Justin's over Brit and finds the whole thing very amusing.
Beth: Oh, good God. Justin's entire next album would be filled with songs about it.
Beth: "You broke my heart bitch, then you looked at Elvis while you got hitched."
Beth: ...
Beth: But better.
Melle: **dies laughing**
Melle: nah, Justin's over that phase. Now he'd be all "Sitting at my ex's wedding in Vegas" or somesuch.
Melle: And then runs it through JC to make it even more bizarre.
Beth: Then he'd end up with songs like "I could see your nipples through your wedding dress/ Hahaha, how are you going to get out of this mess?"
Melle: (Lance, the best man: "I feel like I'm in some sort of bizarre fanfic as written by JC."
JC: "Huh. What? Man, that Elvis costume is way cool!")
Beth: Ahahaha.
Beth: JC would do the Elvis hair, too.
Melle: JC-as-Elvis is doing the wedding, Lance is best man, Christina's Brit's totally bewildered maid of honour, ...
Beth: It would be great.
Melle: (Ahaha! I posted the "You broke my heart bitch" bit at Sky and she said:
Schuyler: No, actually, probably not better.
Schuyler: And with beatboxing in the background.)
Beth: And instead of the groom taking off the bride's garter, Christina would do it. Because that would be hot.
Beth: Hahahaha.
Melle: Justin can give away the bride!
Beth: Yes! There would so be beatboxing.
Melle: **hums Britney-Sue Got Married**
Beth: Yes!
Melle: And I'm so putting this in LJ.
Beth: Their wedding song could be the Dixie Chicks' "White Trash Wedding."